My Audio Portrait

My Audio Portrait

What I heard along the East River Park.

I walked along the East River down from 12th Street around noon, when the sun was high and bright in the sky.  There were playgrounds, tracks, baseball fields, basketball courts, and soccer and football fields all along the river.  On one side of me was the river that absorbed and reflected sounds more than it created sounds of its own.  Once a big DEP ship sailed by, creating waves that splashed softly against the walkway.  On the other side, beyond the parks, was the FDR drive, which lent a constant and overpowering hum to the entire environment. 

Intermittently, there was air traffic.  Helicopters chopped through the air.  Much higher above, I could hear the low drone of commercial airplanes.  These are the sounds that made for the keynotes in my environment.  More piercing was the constant chatter and laughter coming from the nearby children’s playground, where occasionally a little girl would scream or a boy would shout.  In the rare moments when all else was silent, a mixture of these sounds constantly intermingled to create the background noise. 

The sounds I came more directly in contact with, and acted as the sound signals, were the patting of jogger’s sneakers on the concrete, the jingling of dog’s collars, the wheels of roller skaters scraping by, the ringing of a bicyclists bell.  People would walk by talking on their phones.  A woman in jogging attire passed by saying “I don’t remember that.  Did you ask him where he was?” before her voice faded off behind me.  Two men, sitting by their fishing rods had a conversation in Spanish, which I couldn’t make out.  Their voices were gruff, but they exchanged laughter.  Way off, on the other side of a baseball field I heard a saxophonist practicing his music.

 

In this area silence could not possibly exist.  The overall texture of the sound, I would have to say, was vibrant and constantly buzzing.  The humming of the FDR drive, and the air coming from the East River made the distinctive sounds in the area.  Even though there was no silence, I still found it relaxing.  All the sounds mixed together to make one huge, soft sound, that acted with the heat of the sun like a cushion that could put me to sleep. 

Define A Space Video

Define A Space Video

My Artist Statement

I always wanted to be a writer.  I thought that if I emulated my favorite writers, then I could shape my world to be like theirs.  I travelled through Europe like Ernest Hemingway.  I searched for romance like F. Scott Fitzgerald.  I took care of a family property in Ireland and even tried to join the Irish army like Leo Tolstoy did in his homeland of Russia.  All the while, through each experience, I wondered, "I'm not there yet.  Why am I not there yet?"  

Finally I exhausted my plans and schemes of how I could be like somebody else, or anybody but myself.  I returned home, defeated and hopeless.  It was in my darkest moments that I looked back on all I had done and had a realization.  Through all my years of traveling and exploring and through every moment of humiliation and triumph, I had been there the entire time.  Instead of appreciating where I was, I spent my most valuable moments thinking about where I wanted to be.  

After realizing this, I began to see the beauty in everything around me.  The beauty was no longer something that I had to search for, tirelessly.  Beauty had become something that I could find in everything.  There was beauty in the homeless man, with one leg, who recited his bitter poetry by the bus station.  There was beauty in the woman who spent hours in the morning doing her hair, putting on makeup, and choosing an outfit for work, only to return home that night and do the same thing the next morning.  There was beauty in the impatient teenager taking orders from entitled customers in the cafe.  

I put traveling on a shoestring behind me.  I could no longer work the late hours or the manual labor and write the way I wanted to write or live the way I wanted to live.  I finally saw that my art wasn't to be something searched for or decided upon.  My art was to be the expression of what had already been decided by the world around me.  That is what I hope to share and I believe I can share it with the world also while making a living for myself through journalism.